The Beef Shtick
23 May, 2019
11 August, 2017
Three years ago I came across the best beef jerky I've ever tasted.
I felt cheated.
For 30 plus years I never knew that jerky could be this good.
I don't forgive you, Jack Links. You hurt me.
I was captive in a basement for years, force-fed inferior jerky until it became acceptable.
They institutionalized me and I suspected there were others.
I was determined to make a change.
One way or another, I was going to free my people. I knew all they needed was to taste a superior jerky.
Determined, I started StickinaBox.com.
The goal was simple: Save my beef jerky eating brethren from becoming brainwashed by a Sasquatch.
The solution: Find the best jerky(s) on the planet, stuff as many of them in a box as I could and send them out as frequently (monthly) and as quickly (free 2-day shipping) as humanly possible.
I became a jerkyologist — Obsessed with finding the best.
I put the message out hoping the others would hear.
A few survivors answered the call. Soon, others followed.
The movement grew and grew.
Today, we're a community. Bound by superior jerky.
But, our work isn't done, there are others out there who are desperate for our help.
If you see someone at check-out about to purchase dog-meat jerky, slap it out of their hand, grab them by the shoulders and ask them to repeat the words, Stick. In. A. Box.
Chant it with them. Help them see the light.
P.S. Enjoy this amazing video by our very own beef jerky connoisseur and the official, unofficial ambassador of Stick in a Box, Vincent Dooly.